By Antwann Johnson
Being that one of my füture goals is to assist today’s youth who may have fallen by the wayside, I feel it is my duty to understand the emotional and psychological trauma they endure that leads them to make life-altering decisions out of anger, sadness, and a wide range of other emotions.
Many of us as adults fail to pay attention to or understand the warning signs that a young child (or teenager) is dealing with difficult situations, so their cries for help are silenced because we are usually preoccupied with things that we feel take more precedence until it is too late.
I felt the need to shed light not only on our children being ignored but also on the traumatic effect that being bullied has on them as they struggle to find their own way in today’s world. These kinds of issues embody what many of today’s children are experiencing, but sadly? NOBODY’S LISTENING… This Is just one of their stories:
Stoney was a 14-year-old adopted boy of mixed heritage. His birth mother was African American, but his father was German, so he had a light complexion, freckles, and long, curly hair that was sandy-brown. He was raised by two homosexual fathers in a rural area outside of the city limits. He learned the importance of survival from his fathers, but nothing could prepare Stoney for the massive shift that was to come in his life. His parents convinced him that moving to the city would be best for the family, especially since one of his fathers would be starting a new job and the move would cut down on a lot of driving time for his daily commute. A few months later, they moved into a large building complex nestled within a middle-class suburban community. The people there seemed friendly and welcomed them with gifts, but Stoney didn’t like it one bit because there was so much of a difference from the way he was used to living his life. He wasn’t used to the noise and the fact that every time he stepped outside their front door there were always people around. To make matters worse, he was socially awkward since he had been home-schooled for his entire childhood; so, he lacked the communication and social skills that many of the urban youth had. He enjoyed the outdoors and the wild and felt at home in the country and in the woods surrounded by nature.
Eventually, Stoney was also told that he had to be enrolled in school, where he would be beginning his freshman year of high school. Stoney was extremely fearful because he didn’t know what to expect, and everything to him was foreign. All the kids seem to crack jokes about him and either laugh at his appearance, his choice of dark, gothic clothes, the fact that his parents were gay, or the heavy metal music he would always be seen listening to that brought him comfort and solace. It became shockingly clear that Stoney was not accepted by most of the kids, and even the girls would shy away from him. It was a struggle trying to process it all with no help from the other teens. Stoney struggled with his schoolwork; because even though he was smart enough to do the assignments, he didn’t want to be looked at as a nerd, so he purposely dumbed himself down in an effort to fit in with the other kids. Stoney often tried to talk to his parents about many of his struggles; but time and time again, he was told.
“Not right now…”
Usually, because his parents would either be in the midst of a heated argument about something such as the bills or their conflicting schedules or because they would be too busy doing something around the house to take the time to stop and listen to what he had to say.
One day, while Stoney was walking down the street, he recognized a familiar face from school. It was Sarah, a girl from Stony’s math class who was one of the only children who was actually nice to him. She smiled and waved when she saw him; and after a brief encounter, they both parted ways. Later that week, Stoney and Sarah were in the hallway at school discussing one of the math assignments that they had just been given, when several of the older teenagers began harassing them. They pushed Stoney into a locker and knocked Sarah’s school books out of her hand while yelling racial and homophobic slurs at the both of them. There had been other occasions where Stoney had witnessed this particular group bullying others within the school, but nobody seemed to do anything about it. Even some of the teachers seemed to turn a blind eye to the apparent bullying; perhaps feeling that it was best to pretend that they didn’t notice anything in hopes that they would not become targets themselves. Again, Stoney tried to communicate what he was experiencing to his parents, but his cries always went unheard because of something else that had more importance.
The following night, Stonev’s parents were arguing again so he decided to take a walk down the street and get some snacks from the gas station that wasn’t too far from his home. He was fiddled with his phone to change the song he was listening to and looked up just in time to see Sarah walking out of the gas station with multiple plastic bags full of groceries hanging off of her arm. She waved at him with her free hand and yelled, “See you at school, Stoney!”, but this time, Stoney had a creeping sensation that something wasn’t right. As he walked onto the gas station lot, Sarah was climbing into the passenger side of an unfamiliar, rusty, red 4×4 truck with cigarette smoke curling out of the driver’s side window. As the pick-up rumbled past, Stoney noticed that it was being driven by an older male with shaggy facial hair who gave Stoney a sinister sneer as he passed by him blaring country music from the radio. The days came and went, but Stoney realized that Sarah had been absent from school since the last time that he saw her at the gas station, and he began to wonder about her whereabouts. The other students were becoming curious as well; then one day their principal walked in the classroom, apparently flustered, and broke the news to everyone.
“Listen up everybody; there’s no easy way to put this, but your fellow classmate Sarah has passed away. She was the victim of a brutal attack, and her body was found this morning by the authorities. There will be a candlelight vigil held for her outside of the gymnasium this Saturday at 6 PM if anyone would like to attend “
As the principal briskly turned to leave back out of the classroom, Stoney immediately raised his hand; but the principal waved him off; and again, he heard,
“Not right now…”
Class ended for the day, and school was finally out. As Stoney was walking home from school, he was again attacked by the school bullies. They pushed him to the ground and yelled mean comments at him as they kicked him, saying things like…
“Maybe YOU killed Sarah!”
The group heard a loud voice from an adult across the street that yelled •Enough” and they ran. Stoney was left bleeding and confused. As he slowly picked himself up off the ground, he looked up just in time to notice a familiar raggedy, red pick-up truck pulling off from in front of a house further down the block. He thought to himself,
“That’s the truck I last saw Sarah in.”
Stoney headed home; and as usual, his parents were preoccupied with their back-and-forth bickering. He quietly went to his room and went to bed. Stoney fell into a restless sleep; tossing and turning; and when he awoke, he felt different. Still dressed in his bloody clothes from the attack, it was as if his mind was lost in a haze.
Stoney wrote two words on a piece of paper and then went to his parent’s bedroom. He retrieved his father’s automatic pistol from a shelf in his closet, along with 2 extra magazines of ammunition, and headed to school. Stoney had finally decided he’d had enough and that it would be a day of reckoning for all those who had ever crossed him. He had felt trapped with no way out for long enough, so he made the decision to take matters into his own hands.
Off to school, he went and one by one he located those who had attacked and bullied him and issued what he felt was justice for all that he had endured from them. In his mind, he treated it like he was playing a video game and felt no remorse as shots rang out through the halts of the school. Panic and terror overcame everyone inside of the building as Stoney went from classroom to classroom seeking vengeance. As his last stop, Stoney went to his math class, balled up the piece of paper that he had previously written two words on, and threw it at his teacher, who was crouching under his desk. Stoney then turned the gun on himself and ended his own life.
Once the police had gotten everyone out of the school safely and were sure that the building was clear of any threats they began to take statements from everyone regarding what had happened. The math teacher walked up to where one had just finished interviewing one of the students and said, “Excuse me, officer, Stoney gave this to me before he committed suicide.” As the officer opened the paper and read it, his face paled and he shook his head. Another officer walked up, seeing how visibly shaken the first officer was and asked what the paper said. He replied, “Nobody’s Listening…”